Hello world!

My very first blog about ME!

Sitting at a café in Manhattan, I’m watching videos on soul travel, and looking for tickets to back to Texas.   It is a hypnosis type of video, and I cannot seem to multitask, when this powerful voice is telling me close my eyes and such.   I am writing, because I have been trying to find myself.  Through traveling physically, moving different cities, detoxing so much, and seem to still dig deeper.  Why am I interested in this, I want to start understanding my past.  And when I say the past, I do not mean when I was born, and those childhood years, I am talking about my past lives.  We are all one being, and constantly coming into this world of consciousness into a new body, but with same lives, that are being relived.  I am in fascination with this.  I want to dig really deep and see what is up.   I am such an odd person now, in peoples’ eyes.  I do not go out anymore, rarely to bars, I eat only fruits and vegetables, obsessed with detoxing, not caring about anything in this world, and would rather spend my money on healing myself, and going to a country or place or hardly no pollution, to be in full meditation.  I thirst for having oneness.  I now know, this is the truth.   Not all this religion malarkey.  They are ALL stories being told over and over again.  Why do people live in a box?  Why do parents force a faith on their children? Why do parents force their children to eat certain foods?  Why are we raised in such a chaotic world?  Who are we?  And what the hell have we done to ourselves, and continue to do to ourselves?  I am in deep confusion with my life.  And it is just not today that I am feeling this way.  It has been since FOREVER.  I always was the black sheep in my family, the girl who rebelled against everything, the one who wanted to know all the answers and kept seeking and trying to new ways to understand my own reality.  WHY was always a question in my sentence.  So far, I have not come across anybody to answer me.   And to be honest, it not that I need an answer.  I understand, we are given this life, because of an old soul, trying to accomplish something in this life again, and we are given total control of all decisions we make.  However, it is up to us whether or not we are able to figure the root, so we can ACTUALLY START TO LIVE!  Do I sound crazy?  To some, for sure.  To me, hell no.  It is crazy how the ego is so powerful, it is like the devil.  It can change your mind so quickly, revert your thinking, ruin health, and so much more.   Most of the people on this planet, are truly unaware of themselves, and their surroundings, and suffocate in this unreality, that most of us are born into.   I am an extremely different soul, I feel it, I know it, I act like it.  And Now is time, to discover who I am.